The brain naturally gravitates toward the negative. We have been talking about the perils of a judgmental attitude and how it is a cancer in relationships. Every working person knows how it wreaks havoc in the workplace and sends everyone home in a bad mood. As leaders we need to train people to think differently and arm them with tools to think positively and appreciate diversity of thought.
In our leadership development workshops, the most helpful tool we have is the Personal Motivation and Engagement assessment. Have you taken it yet? If not, talk to me!
We use this to identify a person’s top six motivators, which are made up of one’s beliefs, attitudes and values.
Your top two motivators are what get you out of bed in the morning, excited to take action on something that brings you joy — like making money, learning something new, helping a person in need, or making an impact on a large scale. The top two motivators are what we use to think positively, to move toward things we value.
Conversely, our bottom motivators may cause us to be judgmental and to be trapped in our own negative world of criticism. If we are not aware of what motivates us and equally what “de-motivates” us, we are in danger of criticizing others when they think and behave differently than we do.
Awareness of what our motivators and values are helps us avoid judging others. Instead we learn to accept that people think differently than and are motivated differently than we are. Thus it shields us from the hazards of being a critical person.
But if that awareness doesn’t happen, having a judgmental, critical spirit leads you to be controlling of others.
This is based in fear. You see, if your story is that you are right and you are the expert, then you automatically limit your growth to learn and evolve as a person. People learn and grow from their mistakes of judgment.
If you are always right and never wrong, you are probably a very small thinker who believes you are the smartest person in the room. This often leads to an unprofitable business, a depressed life, and an unhappy marriage full of blind spots and joy killers.
If any of this even remotely describes your situation, we need to talk!